When Your Positive Thoughts Aren’t Enough

It’s been an interesting two weeks.  We’ve gone from our very normal life to realizing it’s time for my husband to find a new job.  I feel excited for the change and new adventure, yet I find worry and doubt seeping into my thoughts. Can I have True positive and negative thoughts at the same time?

I’ve been in the personal development world for many years now and most people would agree, positive thinking is the best way to go, so I keep reminding myself…

  • This is going to be exciting.
  • We’ve been looking forward to this.
  • It’ll be fun.
  • I am excited to see what the Universe has in store for us.
  • We’ll work out the details as we discover what they are.
  • We are taking inspired action and following inspiration.

But the reality is, the future is uncertain; filled with questions and lots of holes and unknowns.  My brain doesn’t like holes. My brain is a problem solving machine and wants to fill in these holes because it feels unsafe. Because of our uncertain future my brain also has these thoughts …

  • This is scary and very uncomfortable.
  • I’m concerned for my children. Are we doing the right thing for them?
  • I don’t know what to do next and/or what do we do next?
  • Patience is hard and uncomfortable.
  • This is not fun!

These, not so pretty thoughts, are causing me to feel doubt and worry.  These unhappy emotions, unchecked over many days, build up inside and I begin to wonder why I don’t feel so hopeful even though I am consciously saying and believing the positive statements a lot.  The funny thing is, I really do believe these positive statements, but the negative ones also feel right. Can that be true?

As I pondered this strangeness today, I was reminded that emotions are meant to “flow.”  I am consciously flowing a steady stream of positive statements that bring me peace, hope, and joy for our future.  There is another set of thoughts that are causing me to feel worry, because it can only see holes. So how do we solve this problem of wanting to be positive, which I should be; but not getting stuck with heavy emotions?

The answer hit me… acknowledge the negative thoughts periodically!  They don’t have to be center stage, but they are there, and need to be validated so they can continue their flow.  I then realized, it is perfectly acceptable to be excited and scared at the same.  It is fine to be concerned that I’m doing what’s right for my children and be hopeful for the new amazing experiences they could have.  It is just fine to not know what to do next, but keep asking that question so I will get the inspiration to know what to do.

In fact, this job hunting experience should be a bit uncomfortable and scary, as well as exciting.  So there’s no problem here. I’m normal! What a relief (sigh). Now I feel free to go about my pretty normal day unburdened by doubt and worry.  

I also realized that I will need to be willing to experience this positive and negative thought flow for however long it takes for my brain to get the answers it needs, which could be several weeks or months in my current situation.  Good to know!

So, when the positive thoughts aren’t enough, ask yourself when the last time you allowed the negative thoughts to surface and flow away.  They aren’t bad. Avoiding them and pushing them down stops the flow and they start to clog up. We are humans with both kinds of thoughts.  They balance each other out when managed properly. Keep the balance.

Lots of love and light,

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