While trust in the Lord is one of the most valuable lessons we keep practicing in life…
Other emotions play a role in overcoming adversity also.
First let me explain the Law of the Vacuum:
This is better explained with examples:
Do you clean off your coffee table, only to find that your kids have dropped new stuff on it just minutes later? There was stuff on that counter, so by law other stuff must takes its place. You can choose what you want there (flowers, or a decoration or nothing) or random stuff will collect there on its own.
Do you WANT a new car, but just don’t have the money. If you got rid of the old car, then you’d NEED a car, and the universe would align to help you find one you could afford somehow. You sacrifice something for something else.
This idea works with our emotions also… when you release unpleasant emotions it makes room for new ones. If you are paying attention, you can choose which emotion you’d like to fill that space.
A 23th-century poet once said, (fill in the word ‘sorrow’ with any negative emotion)
“Sorrow prepares you for joy. It violently sweeps everything out of your house, so that new joy can find space to enter. It shakes the yellow leaves from the bough of your heart, so that fresh, green leaves can grow in their place. It pulls up the rotten roots, so that new roots hidden beneath have room to grow. Whatever sorrow shakes from your heart, far better things will take their place.”
Ponder this for a minute…
We must let go of, or sacrifice our old thoughts and unpleasant feelings, to make room for new thoughts and more pleasant feelings. Until we are willing to do this, we hold onto our old and unpleasant thoughts and feelings.
What are you willing to sacrifice to feel better while experiencing your adversity? Old thoughts? Unhelpful emotions? Old behaviors?
**
When we choose to change ourselves or our situation, we choose to let go of some things…
Sometimes this is hard, and we mourn or grieve the loss of those things.
For example, when I choose to follow my husband to a new job in a new town…
I choose to let go of my wonderful life there. I moved to an unfamiliar neighborhood, with people I didn’t know. I let go of the activities and community relationships I had built there (to some extent).
It was hard and I cried – a lot!
Yes, I knew it was the right move for my family and I trusted the Lord had led us here miraculously…
I also knew I had to be willing to experience a buffet of negative emotions, as well as joyful ones, along the way.
I experienced living with my in-laws for a time (and nobody wants to do that, no matter how much you love them).
I experienced feeling alone and friendless for a long time.
I experienced wondering: Where should I get involved in the community? Where is my place here? (still working this one out if I’m honest).
As I let go of the old, it created a vacuum for new experiences and opportunities.
I was blessed with more beautiful home, wonderful new friendships, and new opportunities to grow.
I wrote out hundreds of thought models to help me notice why I was feeling the way I was (my thoughts), and to help me choose how I wanted to show up in this new life- so I could practice that more.
I have experienced sorrow and JOY!
I have experienced frustration and ACCOMPLISHMENT.
I have experienced despair and HOPE!
So while you are facing your adversity, one of your choosing or not, remember that emotions (pleasant and not pleasant) are part of the journey.
Notice them, don’t resist them, manage them in safe and healthy ways…
And then lean into your faith in Jesus Christ! Trust the journey!
**
Even though I know I’ll experience unpleasant emotions along the way… I prefer to feel better.
What will help me feel better?
Good, supportive, hopeful thoughts…
And where can I find new thoughts to try out?
There are lots of places you can find great thoughts: podcasts, books, friends and family, scriptures…
But how do you know where to go?
We have so much information at our finger tips, it’s overwhelming sometimes…
So my go-to place to discover ‘better thoughts’ is PRAYER!
Often one word, or a short phrase or idea will pop into my mind.
Often times, those phrases come from a conference talk, scriptures, podcast, something a coach said, or book I had been reading; and the spirit is answering my question by reminding me of that.
What have I learned from this?
To surround myself with good people, to read good books, to keep educating myself, to listen to uplifting material…
And especially to make prayer and the study of the words of Christ a daily part of my life.
As I study the stories in the scriptures, I gain a deeper understanding on what the Lord is teaching, not just saying. I wonder why certain characters responded to their circumstances the way they did. I wonder how they must have felt. I wonder what why were thinking to help them feel that way.
And I have discovered truths that bring joy into the journey!
–What are safe and healthy ways to manage your unpleasant emotions? There are lots of ways, some you are doing and some you might what to try. I can help you notice what is working in your life and offer other activities you’d like to try. Message me and we’ll chat.
