One of the most helpful emotions to use while doing self-coaching is…
CURIOSITY
In fact, it has become one of my favorite go-to emotions.
When writing down old thought patterns, look at them with curiosity, not guilt, anger or sadness.
Wallowing in guilt about old thought patterns doesn’t help you decide to make a change, but
wondering how you could change your thoughts helps you find more useful ones.
Being angry, and placing blame on others about your old thought patterns keeps you stuck and
rigid, where curiosity helps move away from that rigid thinking and towards thinking patterns that
might be more useful.
And while you might mourn the loss of an old thinking pattern, wishing it was right or helpful
(even though it’s not), it’s okay to let that go and move on to better thinking.
In fact, curiosity helps us see the world as we have created it (good or not), and wonder about it
in a safe place in your head – not judgment, just a lot of curiosity!
I’m not saying don’t feel angry, guilty or sad… just that it’s okay to feel those emotions, and then
move into curiosity to help you move forward.
Curiosity is a neutral emotion
Curiosity doesn’t pick sides or demand you comply to one way of thinking over another.
In fact, it allows you to see multiple views of the situation.
It gives you options and possibilities that you might not have seen before.
In turn you may gain a better understanding of the whole picture in your situation, and better
discern which way is going to be a more productive way of thinking.
Curiosity often aids in making BETTER decisions, because you have more information to work
with.
And it allows you to change your mind if you find out more.
Curiosity helps you look at several possible ideas and allows you to ponder about each.
One of the most repeated verses in scripture is “Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye
shall find; knock, and it will be opened unto you.”
When we are willing to “ask” questions and “seek” for alternative ideas we are being curious!
As we seek for answers to our questions, lots of possibilities may be presented to us…
Such as, “which job should I take?” or “where should we live?”
Or perhaps, “What is the best way to discipline THIS child?” or “What is the best way to handle
this situation?”
Often, you are given several possibilities to choose from…
Being curious (and prayerful) about each, is what helps us make decisions that are in alignment
with what we want and our values.
In fact, being curious about some principle of the gospel and seeking for more insight and
learning about it, is one of my favorite ways to study gospel topics (and are often the subject of
these posts).
–What principle of the gospel are you curious about? Is there one you’d like to understand
better? Start asking questions and then seek, seek, seek.
